bang bang

bang bang

ya know some old people are pretty cool

so.. I was in nyc, this weekend attending a seminar for llm satellite churches.
not sure how I feel about it. jin sung nim, gave a really good talk at the end, about true children, which was really good. but the rest...
my brain kinda turned off around lunch time of the 2nd day, I dont do well in meetings, or places were people are talking for long durations of time.

but anyway..
this is one thing I thought was interesting enough to post up here.
I was eating lunch at llm and didnt want to eat standing, so I went to a couch where an old japanese woman was sitting. across from her was an american member. I kinda just sat and listened to their conversation. Apparently the japanese woman was one of the first group of missionary's sent to america. She told a story of how while at a certain location all she and the other missionary's had to eat, was the edges of bread that were thrown away daily at a local bakery and jam made from juice powder, water and flour. for 3 years thats all they ate. breakfast, lunch, dinner. the shit food, made her really sick, and her health was terrible after she finished the her mission. She had a son sometime after who was born mentally handicap due to the mothers poor health condition. the son later died at age 15.
but during this whole time the woman seemed at peace with everything. no hate, no resentment, no complaining.
I was amazed, I have so much respect for this woman whos name I dont even remember, but I felt more close to her than I do my own grandparents.
do I enjoy that these things happen, not at all. but the reason I wanted to write about her was because of her amazing attitude. tons of bad stuff happens to you and instead of being bitter, you are content and at peace. thats awesome.
thanks old japanese lady it was an honor to meet you.


....
well i guess thats all i have to say
have a good day.

we used to love ourselves, we used to love one another

I was listening to "great big white world " when I started to draw that.
its a song by Marilyn Manson from the album Mechanical Animals ( which imo, is a really awesome album)



but anyway,
for some reason I feel very refreshed right now.
im not sure why.
in the morning my body felt like I had done some crazy exercises the day before.
but I didnt, I did eat alot at a korean meat bbq.
maybe that was why.

anyway #2
for some reason I have this fear... im not really sure how to describe it, but i'll try.
it's a fear of... something appearing behind me, while im washing my face.....¿?...
....
like if you wake up,
go to the restroom,
turn on faucet,
make cup shaped hand,
fill cup hand with water,
put face in hand,
lift face,
wipe water away from eyes,
and see this standing behind you.
















that'd freak me out.

so...
I've been listening to this all female band, they're pretty great, maybe a new favorite.

this is an acoustic/live version of one of their songs.
Warpaint - Billie Holiday

B.I.L.L.I.E.H.O.L.I.D.A.Y.
B.I.L.L.I.E.H.O.L.I.D.A.Y.
B.I.L.L.I.E.H.O.L.I.D.A.Y.
B.I.L.L.I.E.H.O.L.I.D.A.Y.

As i walk this line, i am bound by the other side
and it's for my heart that i'll live
cause you'll never die.
Well if you want to know me, i'm a war. (B.I.L.L.I.E.H.O.L.I.D.A.Y.)
Come paint. (B.I.L.L.I.E.H.O.L.I.D.A.Y.)

Nothing you can say can tear me away from my guy.
Nothing you can do cause i'm stuck like glue to my guy.
I'm sticking to my guy like a stamp to a letter,
like birds of a feather, we stick together.
I'm telling you from the start, i won't be torn apart from my guy.

Nothing you can buy could make me tell a lie to my guy.
Nothing you could do could make me untrue to my guy.
I gave my guy my word of honor to be faithful and i'm gonna.
You best be believing, I won't be deceiving my guy.

As a matter of opinion I think he's tops.
My opinion is he's the cream of the crop.
As a matter of taste to be exact,
he's my dear as a matter of fact.
No muscle-bound man can tear me away from my guy.

B.I.L.L.I.E.H.O.L.I.D.A.Y.
B.I.L.L.I.E.H.O.L.I.D.A.Y.
B.I.L.L.I.E.H.O.L.I.D.A.Y. (if she wants to go, if he wants to go, if she wants to go, if he wants)
B.I.L.L.I.E.H.O.L.I.D.A.Y. (if he wants to go, if she wants to go, if he wants to go, if she wants)
B.I.L.L.I.E.H.O.L.I.D.A.Y. (if she wants to go, if she wants to go, if she wants to go, if she wants)
B.I.L.L.I.E.H.O.L.I.D.A.Y. (if she wants to go, if she wants to go, if she wants to go, if she wants)
B.I.L.L.I.E.H.O.L.I.D.A.Y.

They currently have one album out, its called "exquisite corpse"
its a 6 track album but every song on there is really good.



have a good day

a formula to experience god

what you need:
headphones
music
chair
some nature

1. find premium sitting environment.
- you want to be as comfortable as possible. If its cold get a jacket, hot find some shade, or just go out at night.
- I like a nice breeze, if you prefer certain weather conditions go out at those times.
2. prep music
- create playlist of some of your favorite music
3. set chair in found premium sitting area.
- if you prefer the ground then go with that.
4. sit
5. turn on music
6. adjust volume to drown out everything else around you.
7. turn off brain
8. enjoy

if I had feet they would walk me places

i think I figured out why I get depressed when I think about school.
In some sense I feel it's a complete waste of time and money.
I feel the system has degraded into a system that no longer wishes to teach but to make $$$.
examps: the major I have chosen is Web Design.
Which, in total credits that actually apply to that class: 30.
But total credit required to get my associate's 68, wtf????
68 - 30= 38 bs classes
???
it makes 0 (zero) sense.
the excuse: "College is meant to create well rounded individuals."
real reason: instead of making thousands (which is already a retarded amount) off of you, we'd like 10 - 100's of thousands.
why: Cause we're a bunch of greedy pricks. yey! :(
I think eventually you'll just be able to buy your credits.
it would save time and maybe lower costs.
so, dear america
thank you for destroying education in general.
and congratulations on making a nation of idiots.

i wish I could turn off my brain for things like this,
then I could just bite the bullet and be blissfully blissful.

but anyway. i'm hungry, my stomach is gurgling.
happy day after mothers day!

this is the song i'll play at your funeral

if at some point in my life I have an archnemesis this is the song i'll play at their funeral.
The Bloodhound Gang - I Hope You Die


on another note some drawings

Gensis:1:32-34
And God Said, "Let there be burgers"
And He took a bite of the greasy new creation.
And God saw that it was good.


the unlikely hero.


(i thought I misspelled funeral up there. but I guess its just one of those words that doesn't sound like it looks. FUN - ER - AL :)


have a good one.

some cheese for your daily bread

haha, man that's some pretty genius wording, if I may say so.
some pics that I did but havnt posted.
enjoy.











have a good week.

unconscience conscience

i had this dream, It's been awhile since i had a very detailed one so I thought id just try and write down everything I remember before i forget.
(its a dream, so things might not make sense)

1st: I'm in side this really big castle. It's a really nice castle, you know the nice ones, big gardens, high towers, lots of rooms. Well im just walking around this castle exploring the place. I walk to a place with people gathering. I dont know how I came to realize it but, they are church members gathering to hear a talk by IJN. I have to use the bathroom, so I leave the room and search for the restroom. I'm walking down a hall way, and I notice Rebecca L. I just say hey, and she says hey. Then I keep walking.
The bathroom seems to be on the 1st floor of this place im in, and it reminds me alot of a high school hallway, lots of teenagers, is loud and busy.
I make it to the restroom, and go to the last stall to the left. I start peeing, and the guy next to me keeps looking over, I look over at him and notice that its not one guy, but 3 black guys shiting and pissing in the same stall. I'm feeling uncomfortable so I want to leave, but Im still peeing. It felt like a 10min piss or something. During this time I get a phone call from my dad asking me somthing on the lines of "have they started the returning of the blessing ring ceremony, I think someone is trying to scam us". The piss keeps going and sometime during this I get bored and decide to pee onto a fire place. It turns out that the fire place was an electric fire place, it blows up and catches fire. Now I have finally finished, but the fireplace is burning. Yoshi O. appears and gets the fire out, it turns out he works for the building as a janitor, he dosnt like his job and tells me about it for a bit.
I start to make my way back to the meeting room. During this I find that this building seems to have 4 different levels.
Bottom level 1st: Restroom/highschool place
2nd: Military training zone.
3rd: Bowling Alley
4th: Gathering room/halls that lead to the outer castle area.
2nd room: Military zone.
As I got to the second level, I opened a door hoping to get back to the room. Inside this room was a war zone, at least thats what it looked and sounded like. Their was gun fire, bombs, shouting, explosions, people crawling under barbwire, drill sargents, army stuff. I thought it was a war at first, but on closer inspection they were all training. A sargent sees me and asks me what im doing so I leave and goto  the next level.
3rd: Bowling Alley:
The bowling alley looks alot like your average alley, except that.... well actually maybe it wasnt a bowling alley. I remember padded flooring and mirrors all around. So maybe it was a gym instead. So I walk into the gym and see the stairs to the next level. Standing infront of these stairs in a guy holding a huge bowlin ball, its like a giant bolder thing. He's standing with the ball in his hand and tells his friend to hold out his hand. This friend guy is standing on the other side of the room. The bowler looks alot like the black guy from The Office, (not Carl, but the one that works in the warehouse). Anyway, he throws the ball, towards the ground, it bounces up, off a wall and lands in the friends hand. The bowler then begins to through the ball to the ground which it then bounces up and goes flying around the room, (like a powerball, or that scene from Men In Black with the green goo, or like Flubber.) I run across the room as fast as I can, I get hit by the bowling ball, fall down, then continue to the exit, I get hit again, but it was right as I went through the door.
4th level gathering room:
I make back to the fourth floor. The halls are busy with kids, I assume these are children of the parents in the gathering room, I see Rebecca L again and say hey. I go to where the room is but no one is their. I continue walking but I cant find anyone. It seems that the castle was overrun, I dont see anyone but there are places that you can tell that someone was killed there, bloodsplatter and body parts. As I walk through the castle I can hear a woman on a loud speaker/PA system, I dont remember what she is saying but it reminded me of somethin you would think you would here in Soviet Russia or a Nazi occupied france.
I try and get to the back of the castle but the door has been sealed, so I try to climb the wall and jump over, it turns out that above the wall is a trap, I fall into the trap which causes the walls around me to come together, squishing me, I die.
But the dream keeps going on.(At this point the world turns into a video game thing, to be exact "Dragon Age") I'm now in a 3rd/birdseye view of whats going on. On the other side of the wall a group of warriors is awaiting an attack. The castle was taken over by monsters/goblin things. The door breaks open and they start to fight. The woman on the PA announces that the leader of the goblins has entered. The warriors go to fight this leader guy, they win.
I wake up.


(i just remembered but at one point in the dream I started taking out my teeth. I was feeling my teeth with my tongue, when one of them fell out. I started touching others and they would also all out when I would touch them.)