awkward moment

bud#1: "hey bud, long time no see."

bud#2: "..."

uh oh, awkward ...

Sometimes I find that the music I listen to while drawing has an impact on the drawing.

I was listening to this song: "Ouroboros"




It appears to me
quoting alarms
(The) guillotine smirks
In your house I smothered
Sight unseen
Sworn to harm
Ground to a powder
And soaked through the board
Don’t you ever, ever, ever trust my mercy
Don’t you ever, ever, ever trust my mercy
When will you flirt with all that’s burning
Keep them safe and by your side
Of all that’s left
A lucid home
Anecdote settles
In the smear of this corpse
If the larvae speaks
Ask where to go
They mount the maker
With a sulphur in fume
Don’t you ever, ever, ever trust my mercy
Don’t you ever, ever, ever trust my mercy
When will you flirt with all that’s burning
Keep them safe and by your side
Of all the warnings that you gave me
With all components in the fault
Have you ever heard me scraping it will be hard to hold
Don’t you ever, ever, ever trust my mercy
Don’t you ever, ever, ever trust my mercy
When will you flirt with all that’s burning
Keep them safe and by your side
Of all the warnings that you gave me
With all components in the fault
Have you ever heard me scraping it will be hard to hold
All I hear mending the gap
fall in here might not make it back
Call that someone may they hear you
Take me with you It’s not safe in here
And all you ask is why, why, why
And all you ask is why I’m certain
you’re holding on
mirror floats to the surface [holding on]
Of all the warnings that you gave me
With all components in the fault
Have you ever heard me scraping it will be hard to hold
Of all the warnings that you gave me
With all components in the fault
Have you ever heard me scraping it will be hard to hold
They lost the presence they were holding
Looks like the tenants flickered off
If the cell that holds me breaks me
It’ll be hard to hold




have a nice day

tired

i realized something today.
i dont cope well with pressure.
im supposed to be running a winter camp this year.
camp? me? running?
i'm a techie i sit behind a desk or work behind the curtains.
i'm not a people person, but.
idk.

when the pressure hits, i just want to sleep.
forget about everything and just sleep.

hm...
2 1/2 weeks...
what im I doing?
what im I supposed to do?

dont fuck this up marten.

peace
love
sleep

have a nice day.



(hmm. thanks for listening)
(i miss you, alot)

im not strong, but you make me feel strong.
im not brave, but you make me feel brave.
im not warm, but you make me want to be.

love you.

this song reminds me of you.

smell like dog

hmm were to start?

well lets see...
um I was locked out of my house today, from about 1pm~ till 4pm.
that was....
not as fun as it doesn't sound.
after about an hour of trying to pick the lock based on knowledge gained from youtube,
i gave up and decided to take a nap on a sofa that we have out side.
my dog later came to join me.
now i smell.

end.







have a nice day.
(memo to self, buy lock picking kit. metal scrap wires ineffective)

to infinity....

miss the one that i love alot

Warm sun, feed me up and I'm leery loaded up
Loathing for a change
And I slip some boil away
Swallowed followed, heavy about everything
But my love

Swallowed sorrowed
I'm with everyone and yet not just wanted
to be myself
hey you said that you would love to try some
hey you said you would love to die some
in the middle of a worm on a fish hook
you're the wave you're the wave you're the wave


Swallowed borrowed
Heavy about everything
But my love
Swallowed hollowed
Sharp about everyone
But yourself
Swallowed oh no
I'm with every one and yet not
I'm with everyone and you're not
I'm on everyone and yet
Piss on self-esteem
Forward Busted knee
Sick head
Blackened lungs
And I'm a simple selfish son


Swallowed followed
Swallowed oh no
I'm with everyone and yet not
Got to get away from here
I miss the one that I love a lot
I miss the one that I love a lot

-

have a nice day

burns

its amazing how time seems to slip away at times.
or even stranger how it freezes and doesn't want to move at all.

hmm...
my face hurts.

"Satellite Skin" - Modest Mouse

If you break these moth wing feelings
Powdering dust on your fingers
We know we're not praying we're kneeling
Hard enough just to say you believe them
Well how the heck did you think you could beat them
At the same time that you're trying to be them
Hard enough just to say you don't need it when they
Took it up while you were still eating
Well satellite, satellite skin

Just enough just to say you don't mean it
Well, when everybody's willing to listen
Oh satellite, satellite skin
You can say what you want you're forgiven
Well happy fucking congratulations
Well everyone, everyone wins
Just like being in my own solar system
Doing good things but then totally eclipse them
Oh what's the use, oh what the hell
(Lost before we had a cause, had a cause)

If you break these moth wing feelings
Butterfly knives in the ceiling
Well everyone, everyone's waiting
Detachments get praised and completed
You can say what you want and not mean it
When no one really seems to be waiting
If you sweep up this mess I've created
Nothing's left to show I existed
Except satellite, satellite skin

Asking for a question
Was it easier said than was actually done?
Do you even believe that
Do you even believe that there's a race to be won?

If you break these moth wing feelings
I have seen it all because satellite skin
Over innocent eyes
I'd like to know these morbid opinions
Get stacked in all those usual avoided spots
Just to tell you how I could not have seen
Through to the gist of those unhappy
Happy accidents

have a nice day