my words are not my own

-----sporadic thoughts and words------

far off somewhere.
i find myself but not myself.
searching for answers to questions that are not mine.
where did this come from?
not my own thoughts, then from where?
if not my own why carry the burden?
why not discard and be done.
I cannot.
it has become me.
it has changed me.
I am no longer myself, but the very question I was escaping.
no shelter.
no home.
a part of me forever.
----

birds chirp as I sit entrapped in my cave.
sunlight cannot find me.
I hide.
I wait.
crumbs I eat.
never sleeping.
always awake.
fever burns,
melting away my sanity.
am I safe?
am I away?
no light for me.
no light can find me.

-----


don't close your eyes.
this sight which makes you weep.
grip tight, forcefully.
"look"
"see"
I have created beauty
but beauty is frail.
it breaks.
splinters.
aches.
bleeds.
"again"
"look"
can you not see?
what use is eyes if they cannot feel.
grip again.
force again.
bleed.
weep.
starve.
,
my beauty is gone.
all this time.
time has overtaken me.
time is all i have.
time is my prison.
"wait and see"
"wait and see"

---


-----sporadic thoughts and words------



have a nice day.