"someone will find you, someone always does"

music for tuesday



To all of the women that I've ever loved:
When I was with you, I would say that I was better off
But you were never mine to begin with, all right.
And when I'm gone, carry on, carry on.

To all of my friends with whom I get fucked up:
We will laugh ;til we cry and we'll drink 'til we're drunk
But the world is reborn while we sleep it off
And in the dawn, carry on, carry on.

To all of the songs that I wish I had sung:
You will ring in my ears until my days are done (and you're lost)
But someone will find you, someone always does
To sing along, sing on, sing on.

When I'm gone, carry on, carry on.

Well, the world doesn't care if you're in it or not
Just a little point of steel into the beast you were shot
But the whale's going to dive; he will pull the lines taut
And when you're gone, carry on, carry on.

"It's like a night, night, crawler, crawlin' out in the yard"

some music for today.


There is a house in New Orleans
Where you woke from a coma and they bit your cheek
And they cleaned you out when you went to sleep

Oh, I just wanna change your mind
I just wanna change your mind
And it might be come right away
It might be come till the day I'm done

And I saw it as the house caught fire
And I saw it when the thief got brave
It's like a night, night, crawler, crawlin' out in the yard
And it's comin' over me in waves

But you're haunted by the morning sun
You keep digging till the night is over

I ain't no doctor, babe
I ain't no doctor, son
But I'll cool your fever till the doctor comes
It's a miracle, babe, but it ain't no fun

I just wanna change your mind
I just wanna change your mind
It might be come right away
It might be come till the day I'm done

And I saw it as the house caught fire
And I saw it when the thief got brave
It's like a night, night, crawler, crawlin' out in the yard
And it's comin' over me in waves

But it's not here now
It's the chance of it I hate
It's a hundred thousand miles off 
Comin' closer everyday








"Only Son"

I used to be an only son
My heart was but a stranger
It wallowed in the races won
and craved impending dangers.

When it settled on,
and pined and pondered
On the chosen roads it had to wander.

Well I used to be an only son.
(Yeah) My heart was but again
Oh he has a loaded gun!
And how, above the weather?

And it will always let me forget her
And this sturdy wood will burn forever,
in us together.

I used to be an only son.
(Yeah) My heart was but again
Oh, but he has a loaded gun.
It howled, above the weather.

Oh its evil ways,
let me forget her.

And this sturdy wood will burn forever,
in us together.

musical update

got my recording gear back together.

will try to post some songs soon.

in the mean time enjoy this music + video I made 5 years ago:


dogs and double cheese burgers from Marten Hernandez on Vimeo.

ex·pec·ta·tion

I was listening to a pod cast at work about the power of expectations.
(i'll link it in this post)

it was 2 parts.
part 1 - can the expectations of lab rats, affect the performance of the rats.
One group was labeled "dumb rats"
The other group "smart rats"

The rats where them placed into a maze by the volunteer participants.
results: the rats label "smart rats" completed the task at an much sooner than the "dumb rats".
Were the rats any different, no. The difference was in the expectation of the volunteers.


part 2
Is the social impression we oppose onto blind people, preventing them from seeing?


... so sum things up, Yes.

Expectations are a very dangerous/powerful thing.
If an expectation is able to nestle itself into our mind, we essentially become a prisoner to that expectation.

and how are (sorry I was trying to do my punctuations and proper stuff, have have given up on that)
expectations handed off to us?
Im not really sure, but Im leaning towards
1. Love
2. beliefs
3. tradition
4. fear

1. Love
Love is something I have been thinking alot about.
What is it ? why  do we need it/why do we crave/seek love?
I think im starting to come close to a conclusion but not 100%.

1st, try to forgot your concept/expectation on "love"
Instead of some mystical disneyish force, think of it as energy.
or a necessary physical element your body requires like food (energy)
Similar to food, air, water, (sunlight?) love is a form of physical energy our bodies need to "survive"
And similar to these natural elements (food, air, water) we need a constant supply or we get sick, or die. or something happens.
When love is absent from the body, we as humans begin to "die".
or when (similar to food/water) unheathly love enters the body, we can become sick, and possible die.

The difference between food and love is this:
Food is harvested and grown from outside or bodies, while love is something we personally give out/off. (it comes from within to out, as apposed to out to in)
The love we give off, is grown from the soil and water that is ourselves. But not only that it is also affect by the love we have received.

Think of a child as a plant.
This child developes it's ability to give, receive and harness love from his/her experiences and expectations growing up. Similar to the plant, food, water, sun, air. the child needs physical elements to survive and grow.

(this post is kinda going off topic, I'm not sure If i'll be able to get back on track)

So, how do we "eat" love?
For me I feel like, to say it in the most simple sense:
Love is anything that satisfies our desire/state of being.
How ever small or grand that satisfaction is, and also dependent our the level of desire (want/need).
Hungry (desire) eat burger (satisfaction) = love energy
Depressed (state of being) eat 100 burgers (satisfaction = love energy (but maybe not the best type of energy)

Depending on the love we ingest, effects that amount and type of energy received and processed by our body.

(brain is hitting a wall, I might continue later)

ah-mea-ghing

amazing. nuff said.